I always tell people, “I like to have fun.” This is meant to be a joke (by “joke” I mean a statement meant to make you mad) because I actually hate fun and because most other people seem to hate fun as well. Why is this? Shouldn’t we all love fun?

I’ve been thinking about fun because I am in Disney something right now (check out yesterday’s post for the deets) and it is their semi-fascist mission to ensure you have fun. As I discussed in Another Flavor’s very first post, “it’s so bad when you’re young to be told you’re having fun.” I think it is supposed to be one of those fake-wise paradoxes like if you fail to master your rage, your rage will become your master. (Side note: What was the deal with Mystery Men? It was all over the place! You learned all this stuff about Casanova Frankenstein that turned out not to matter and they didn’t even have William H. Macy do full frontal!) I think fun should come naturally, though. It is almost impossible to have fun in a forced manner.

Do you remember new year’s eve? If you do, you probably didn’t have a very good one. If you don’t, getting blackout drunk only seems like a good idea, it actually is very unhealthy for your eyes and I think eye health is vitally important. Anyways, there is a lot of pressure on new year’s eve (and not just on your eyes). It only happens once a year and you must have fun no matter what. Inevitably it is either a huge letdown or you permanently damage your eyeballs.

I see the same thing here in Disney. I am working on my professional photography portfolio (a.k.a. the three Ps) so here is a picture:

People spend a lot of money to come here and they are GOING TO HAVE A GOOD TIME, DAMMIT! I was at this magical spheroid until after 9 PM and there were a bunch of small children still up. Why? Because these families were determined to have fun. This means if something happens like it is cold, or it rains (both of which happened while I was here) people are brutally disappointed. And something always goes wrong! You can’t realistically expect everything to be perfect so being determined to have fun guarantees that you won’t.

Think back on those times you had fun. Were you thinking about how much fun you were having? No! You were having too much fun! Fun cannot be deliberate. Therego, in order to have fun we must deliberately try to not have it.

Did you follow that? It is extremely logical. For the truly logical thinkers out there, let me demonstrate it in your own language: 00100111011010110. Got it? Good.

So what does this have to do with music videos? Does it have to have anything to do with music videos? It is Free-for-all Friday! This is the day I let my inhibitions run wild! I guess I can relate it to one just for you, the demanding reader. Take a look at this frighteningly serious video for Ana Ng by They Might Be Giants:

Isn’t it funny? Because it is so serious!

The video is about two gentlemen with pretty serious anger management problems.

Sometimes while working at their empty desks, they get so angry! They are angry that they have no paperwork.

There is a lot of very serious frustration at this office.

And possibly pain?

Their duties in the office are very serious as well. For a few hours a day they each must do serious-military-portrait-holding.

There is shouting at the phone time, of course.

Even during the cruel-overlord-mandated play time the play is rigid and serious.

I’m pretty sure this is the opposite of frolicking.

If, outside of work hours, these men are forced to interact with another human being they avoid eye contact because there might be a moment of levity.

Naturally, that must be avoided at all costs.

These serious men usually end up working themselves to death.

So why am I so delighted by these men? They are deadly serious and I am smiling about it. I think seriousness is inherently ridiculous. If I arrived at Disney world and was told to be very careful with my bag because theft is a serious problem, then I would be having fun. I just get a kick out of it!

I hope someone at Disney takes this to heart and it becomes the most serious place on Earth. One can only hope.

-PTD

I’ve been on a plane recently (check out [Twosday’s post](/posts/twosday-dont- call-me-shirley-airplanes/) for more info!) and that of course means being in airports. While in Midway airport in Chicago I noticed that there are stores that sell books and magazines approximately every 20 feet. There are a few different chains, but sometimes two identically branded stores will be a two minute walk from each other. Are people in airports unwilling to walk more than 10 feet to buy a copy of Men’s Health? Do they then return to their seat at the gate, rest the magazine on their gut, and proceed to read it while gasping for air? I don’t understand it.

The thing that confounds me is that I always assume that businesses are logical. I believe that if they are doing something it means it makes good economic sense. So it apparently makes good economic sense to make sure that every other store in an airport sells J.K. Rowling’s non-Harry Potter novel and the three most recent Dean Koontz books that came out this month. I have no idea why this is. I just don’t understand economics. Or is economics even the right word? Should it be merchandising? Or store-craft? Or scrimshaw- dawdling? I don’t even know enough about it to know the right word!

Here’s another example: The hotel at which my work is having a conference is located in Florida and looks like this:

Don’t get too jealous, it was 40 degrees here when I took this picture.

So how does it make sense to fly people from all over the country to what looks like an outrageously expensive resort to have a day and a half of meetings that could easily be done using the internet? It can’t really just be that management wants to take their families to Disney for free, can it? I refuse to accept that explanation even though it is obviously true. It must make good financial sense to spend a ton of money on plane tickets and hotels so we can spend time wildly applauding at the slightest provocation.

All of this ridiculousness got me thinking about economics and money in general. Have you noticed that some people have money and others don’t? I have. Thanks to the extreme cold, Chicago probably has a few less of the people who don’t have money, but I’m not talking about the truly poor. No one ever talks about them. I’m talking about the regular people versus the super rich. Everyone thinks they are a regular person, no matter how fantastically wealthy, and I am no exception. We always look at those who have a little bit more and wish we were like them. One thing that is immediately noticeable about those above us is clothing.

Anyone can wear nice clothing. But the thing that separates the truly rich (I guess more than rich I mean high class) is that they are very comfortable in the kind of clothing that leaves us regos constantly tugging at our collars. The ultimate high class outfit is the tuxedo, or, as the high class would say, black tie.

Let’s look at a man dressed to the nines, Taco in Puttin’ on the Ritz:

Please ignore the black face. Taco is from Germany and it’s still cool to casually walk around like that there. If you have an issue, take it up with Deutschland.

Contrary to popular belief, Taco did not write this song. It was actually written by Taco’s younger brother, Irving Berlin, who was a child of the eighties. The eighteen eighties! Ha! Heyo!

The song is about lovable German citizens in black face who dress really nicely despite their poverty. The appearance of class is more important to them than trying to actually achieve that status. So how does Taco dress for this video? Let’s take a look:

Why are we looking at his appearance? Because it’s Sartorial Sursday! Every Sursday Another Flavor looks at a person in a music video and discusses their clothing and general appearance.

So here we see Taco is a tuxedo. His coat has tails and his bow tie is white. He is also wearing white gloves. At first glance it might appear that he is dressed quite nicely, but he is really dressed more like a waiter than a rich person. He is too put together to be an upper class person. Also, the pancake face make-up doesn’t really fit, not to mention the lightsaber. Jedis are more comfortable in robes.

So what is Taco saying? Is it that he just doesn’t know how to dress? No, I think he is saying something mean spirited about those enthusiastic German citizens. I think he is saying that they are fools to spend their meager means on expensive clothing. I disagree. I just think Taco doesn’t understand the economics of it in the same way I don’t understand selling newspapers in an airport or going to Florida.

Dressing nice can frequently lead to a better lot in life. Have you ever heard the saying, “Don’t dress for the job you have, dress for the job you want?” Don’t you just want to punch those people in the face? But that is exactly what the people Taco is singing about are doing. There is nothing wrong with it so there is no need to be snarky. I don’t see what business someone named Taco has being snarky anyway.

I’ll see you tomorrow with an exciting rendition of Free-for-all Friday!

-PTD

Are you familiar with the show Punk’d? It was a little like Queer Eye for the Straight Guy except at the end of it everyone looked like this:

As I’m sure you are aware, it was actually about playing pranks. Anyone who knows me can guess that I hate pranks. First off, they aren’t funny. Second, they just invite counter pranks. No one likes getting pranked, so why would you do something to increase the chance of this happening?

Recently this happened to me: I was leaving work so I walked to the train station. It was brutally cold (I believe it was 11 below 0) so I wanted to stand under the heat lamps. Unfortunately I saw the following sight:

A large group of pigeons had taken over the heat lamps. I approached cautiously, hoping to share the warmth with the birds. They proceeded to aggressively fly towards me. I could have tried to weather the initial attack and see if they gave up, but I knew that pigeons wouldn’t last very long in Chicago if they were unwilling to peck out a commuter’s eyes.

Now, after this harrowing experience, imagine that some jerks came out and claimed that they “got me” while laughing to each other. That is what a prank feels like.

I think you know where this is going. If you don’t, a little background reading would help you. Read here about the history of pranks and their victims.

I’m referring to the rickroll. In 2008 it was extremely popular. Once people got rickrolled they immediately wanted to rickroll other people to the point where you didn’t want to click on any internet links. I know it isn’t a great hardship to accidentally have to watch a music video, but I always felt deeply hurt and betrayed. Over many viewings, though, I came to appreciate the video for Never Gonna Give You Up by Rick Astley. You did watch the entire video every time you got rickrolled, right? It has an earnest quality that really speaks to me.

Lets take another look:

Doesn’t his dancing make you smile? It should. And all of Astley’s outfits are ridiculous.

High-waisted pants, shirt buttoned all the way up, sunglasses, and his shirt and pants are the same color. He is quite a hip dude. But his dancing is great! I feel like he is not at all self conscious about the dorkiness of his dancing.

In a lot of this video he looks like a kid dressed as an adult.

Is he supposed to be a private eye meeting you in the sewers underneath Paris? Or did someone grab a cheap trench coat from the prop department?

For a while he pretends to be a 1940s white jazz artist.

The old-fashioned black (unpaid?) servant looks on with distrust and distaste.

I think there is a hint of disdain in there as well.

He is soon won over and does the splits enthusiastically.

At the end, there are a lot of shots of Astley grinning like a damn moron.

I think this video really lacks guile. That’s probably why my hackles were so raised in 2008 when I kept getting rickrolled. I think Rick Astley is the kind of guy who would just keep clicking those links.

I’m not sure what compelled me to write about a dead internet meme, but here at Another Flavor we like to keep our finger on the pulse of what’s hip, boss, and the bee’s knees. We really try to keep a leg up on the pile. Join us tomorrow for Sartorial Sursday!

-PTD